Let's talk suicide

Has any of you ever thought of committing suicide? Our Indian friend asked, while he was driving my flatmates and I round town on a lazy Saturday afternoon.

Not sure of what we heard, my Ugandan flatie and I gave each-other the puzzled look and just continued talking.

Then he asked again, this time we heard clearly and we all chorused "No" and the Ugandan asked, what about you?.

He smiled and said 3 times, "I have tried".

My jaw dropped and I quickly discarded my phone, amebo antennae adjusted to hear the gist. He did not go into details but just told us that the last time he  tried was because the girl he loved was getting married to another man. His family and the girl's family had rejected the union. They found another guy for her, so she is getting married soon. 

Suicide is not a new thing to Indians, especially love suicide, a friend who lived in Chandigarh said there is a lake in the city where lovers who are not allowed to marry their true love jump into to end their lives. Last year, there was gist of some girl working with the company who had set herself on fire. Exact reason for killing herself was not really known, some said it was love suicide, some said she was in support of the Telangana issue (creation of a new state for some parts of Andhra Pradesh). I expressed my shock and everyone gave me the look of it is normal, nothing unusual. I was told the story of a guy, who had just joined the company  some years back. He did not like the project he was assigned to, I am guessing, it is a domestic project. He felt the project was not up to mark and since no one was willing to change his project , he jumped from the 10th floor of the office building. 

Recently there was the news of the Tibetan protester who set himself on ablaze in New Delhi to protest against the visit of the Chinese President's visit to India. Unfortunately, the dude is not dead, but has to live with pains of the severe burns he inflicted on himself. 

There was also the Taiwanese lady who killed herself by inhaling poisonous fumes while chatting with friends of Facebook and none of them alerted the authorities.

There are those really happy people, who you never imagined would be having any problems and the next day, you hear the news...she killed herself, He jumped off the building.

According to the Indian guy, Indians are generally emotionally weak, they do not know how to deal with pain or affliction. And those who set them selves on fire or kill themselves for a cause, hope to become immortalised...they hope to be remembered as martyrs who died for what they all believe in. 

Suicide is surprisingly on the increase in Nigeria...Nigerians are ones who pride themselves in their endurance ability. I mean, we endure a lot of pains, calamities and sufferings (I still believe there are nations which suffer more calamities)...we are never one to give up the struggle. We are the hustlers and ever struggling people and amidst all these pains we are ever smiling and grateful for life. Nowadays we hear stories of people jumping into the lagoon, killing others, then killing themselves. I once read of the guy who cut off his penis with the hope to die, dude ended up not dying and will spend the rest of his life without a penis. 

Now we have suicide bombers in Nigeria, those who are dying for extremely stupid causes, they have been brain washed into believing they are fighting Allah's cause, that Allah will grant them Al-Jannah for killing innocent lives. I really don't even know where to begin with these set of people. I can't even begin to imagine the darkness in their hearts and how they can believe they are doing good and fighting Allah's cause by killing  other people.

Someone once posted on twitter that we as human beings cannot deny having thoughts of suicide once in a while, this I argued with him about but he said I am living in denial. 

I am not one to judge, but once in a while when I hear some suicide stories, I just can't help but roll my eyes and be like what the hell were you thinking. Some people justify their suicide and when you read or hear about them you can't help but feel sorry or pity for such victims. 

I can only speak for myself, I hate pain, I do all my best to avoid pain, so I cannot imagine wanting to end my life. Emotionally I am weak, but never weak to the point of considering suicide. My friends say my heart is made of stone, that is why I do not display emotions. I would not say I am not an emotional one, but I am very good at repressing my emotions, which a lot of people say is bad for me. 

I know it is a sad world, really sad world...but since we are all going to die someday why put an end to it by yourself (my 2cents, you don't have to agree).

♥ Lara  from Incredible India

Molara Brown


  1. Thanks for sharing. I agree with you, can't imagine taking my life too. I've never been suicidal and (pray) never will be.

    The suicidal trend is gradually creeping to Africa and Nigeria. Some say its a sign of weakness, others claim it can be a sign of inner strength.

  2. Good grief,that's one way to get conversation going.
    I've heard of some really crazy suicide stories, like one of a young boy who got less than As in hi A-Levels and jumped on train tracks just when a train was approaching.
    It's such a shame how little life is valued and how problems which time heals are magnified so much that's all we can see.
    As for the suicide bombers, they have a different agenda and are motivated than more than emotions.

  3. Suicide, which I've never thought of doing, is a serious thought. When it comes to committing suicide, no, just no. Committing suicide because one didn't get what one wanted is selfish. Every study in every language says the living are forever condemned to a searing pain. Countries where suicide laces cultures have programs to stop the practice, but progress is slow. Any person with thoughts of suicide should see a counselor, religious person, doctor or someone expert in the field for help. Here, in the U.S., if a person says anything about suicide, the person or persons who hear this know to call 911 immediately. All studies say a person who talks about suicide is closer to committing the act. There is no rationalization for suicide, only professional help to overcome the mental health issue.

  4. Oh yea, i read about the Tibetan protester who set himself on ablaze in New Delhi. Too sad. I don't want to imagine his pains right now.

    Like you, i hate pain. As much as i think piercings and tattoos are cute, i'll never consider them. So suicide is a no no for me besides i am one of those annoyingly cheery people with a smile who are just too freaking optimistic. Don't get me wrong, i have my reflective moments and i can be deceptively quiet(which scare people sometimes cos i'm a chatter box) but suicide? No way!

    I love life. I love my life. My life is not all pink and rossy, but i always believe in "it could have been worse".

    Another thing is this, most suicides are psychological and as much as Nigerians are happy people, mental health issues are shushed so people don't get properly treated and most signs are ignored.

    There's a show that i enjoy because i find it hilarious (1000 ways to die) but my mom would not let me watch in peace. She seems to think i'm morbid and she doesn't want to encourage suicidal instincts smh4her

    p.s: sorry for the epistle

  5. Toinlicious: I saw an episode of "1000 ways to die" once and never saw it again because I don't see the point of the show!
    Yes, suicide is prevalent in Asia especially in China and Japan. Kids killing themselves for stupid reasons and to "save face". It's very sad to read about suicide bombings in Nigeria.
    I think it's a cultural phenomenon, more education is needed amongst the younger generation especially.

  6. Apart from suicide bombers, I feel that for the rest that commit suicide, it is because they have lost a sense of hope.

    A lot of us have been through stuffs that can make life seem not worth living anymore, but when we consider the hope of a better future, we just pick ourselves up and keep moving on.

  7. If you have never had suicidal ideation, you will never understand.

    You know how you want to eat ice ceeam? Imagine wanting to die like you want to eat icecream. That's how it feels, and you can't run away from it. It's always there in the back of your mid, let's eat icecream! Let's eat icecream!

  8. Honestly, people are depressed and they are the most happiest people everywhere, but deep down they are sad. We really need to be alert...

  9. Suicide is never a solution to life's problems. God doesn't even pardon it. It's a silly way to deal with things. Every life has a purpose and until people begin to realise they do have a purpose, they will quit life at every inch of doubt they can make it. May God help us and help the stupid ones amongst us who think they are fighting for God by killing their fellow men together with themselves - suicide bombers.

    - LDP

  10. I didnt know suicide ws that pervasive in India. Can we then call it cultural? I understand that as human beings you may go through some trying times that make death look most welcome but I guess it's even easier to translate thought to action when it is a culturally accepted coping strategy.
    That's the sad part.
    I would be too scared to marry a man who tells me he has considered/attempted suicide thrice. i would live on egg shells trying not to trigger another one.