Why not the other way around

The battle and bashing has been on since like for ever.
I have always stayed out of them, because I found them dumb and not worth discussing and I have always felt it had to do with personal choice.I am talking about people's personal choice to date people of other tribe, country and particularly race.
I don't hate on a brother for dating a non-Nigerian or other race, I really have never been bothered.
I once saw a tweet on one of those random TTs on Twitter, where babe wrote that she is still single because the brothers have decided to be gay or date people of other race...biko if you happen to love someone who is not from your country abi race, go for it. 

some weeks back, I attended the birthday of one of the interns here in Hyderabad. The moment I  entered the club and saw them, I knew they were Nigerians but since I do not know them. I stayed on my lane, not because I could not talk to them but here one has to be careful and there are lot of gists about Nigerians even within ourselves. If they are not interns and not students, stay off them because they are usually trouble.

I was dancing with my flatmates and some other interns...I was dancing with a Kenyan guy most of the time and even when one of the Nigerian guy tried to dance with me, I turned to my flatmates.

Last weekend, I attended the farewell party of one of a Nigerian interns who is also a friend and all these Nigerian guys were there, they are students here in India and then when I introduce myself to them they all have this expression on their face. Apparently the dude, I refused to dance with had gone on to tell everyone that I fell his hand by dancing with a Kenyan instead of him. It was so funny that when they hear the Lara the next word was so you are the girl. I really did not think much of this on that day, because we all ended up joking about it and forgot the issue.

Today, I was chatting with a friend who I know has been with a couple of non-Nigerian girls and he told me he was disappointed in me. He talked about how Kenyans do not have swag like Nigerians and whatever gibberish he could think of. Okay, I am not going out with said Dude. I found the gist funny in the beginning but right now I am not amused. I am not one for male bashing but I think, this set of Nigerian boys are just the dumbest I ever met and I would not be surprised that there are a lot of them out.

I can live with or rather I am expected to live the idea of our guys chasing and marrying girls from other countries, biko why can't you.

♥ Lara  from Incredible India

Molara Brown


  1. Hi Lara,coolest femme fatale on blogsville!MwuahMwuahMwuah!!!
    Well for a fact,Nigerians r defintely cooler than Kenyans,for real.We're also cooler than somalis and Ghananians,and,honest,we're just the coolest thing that's happened to Africa!(Rolls my eyes),As if! But i do know what you're talking about.I get that perception alot here too,and admittedly,i also give it sometimes too!Lol! But as for those guys,gotta admitt that,the lot sound like a dim witted bunch!

  2. One sad thing about being abroad is that we (Nigerians) assume that just because we come from the same country, we should somehow become friends.
    Not possible.
    If I dont like you or have anything in common with you, I am unlikely to become your friend - just because we come from the same country. Deal with it.
    Abeg, if you come across an alien from Mars - with all the qualities you are looking for in a man - date him.
    Who doesn't like it should go and hug transformer! :))))

  3. lol...I can imagine ur irritation...indeed "why not the other way around?" I believe in being friends with or dating/marrying WHOEVER you "click" with irrespective of racial or tribal origins.

  4. Not like it matters or anything but i can almost say for a fact that these same set of people would probably also complain about Nigerian women being too career conscious or too independent when the chips are down.

    Guys just think the world starts and ends with them. you wont acknowledge a sister that's within reach back at home yet you wanna become best buddies with her when you're in another man's land!
    She's not a trophy so back off!!!

    I guess ignoring them as you've always done is the best! Do what rocks your boat!

  5. I do wonder about the double standards when dating outside of one's race/culture. I find that Naijas/Africans are harder on women who date non-Africans. Why o? What is good for the goose is also good for the gander o jare!

  6. I agree with PET that it is the traditional paternalistic mentality. Men I have spoken with explain the double standard this way, they marry the different race/nationality woman, she becomes "Ours", but you are leaving the fold for dating outside. I call BS, let everyone be free to find what their heart wants.

  7. They must think they own you in some way or that you owe them something because you're a fellow Nigerian. It seems to me they're bummed not because they are interested in you personally but because you 'rejected' them instead of them having the opportunity to turn you down first.

  8. Laahraahh..wish you could hear me sing it the way my boss does :). Dont mind the haters. Its beef that you rejected them and pikinism that's worrying them. Pls stick to the friends you know, till these guys prove themselves worthy to be part of your circle of friends.

    shuo! Its not by force.

  9. You're right babe....i dont just try and befriend Nigerians like that oh cos like you said, some of them might be trouble. Everybody stay in ya lane and park well.